DEAR ABBY: I'm a 57-year-old, attractive, single, childless woman. Why is it that the men I meet are just plain dumb? They have the conversational skills of 5-year-olds and the same juvenile behavior. They are either emotionally unavailable and just after sex, or at the opposite end of the spectrum -- available emotionally, but the sex is just ... okay. I cannot be the first woman to ask the question: Are boys just dumb? -- SMARTER THAN I THINK IN IOWA
DEAR SMARTER: As a matter of fact, you are the first. With the advent of social media, people's social skills began declining. The men you are meeting may not have the same level of education that you do, but it doesn't mean they are "dumb." Men ultimately want what women want, I think. By that, I mean companionship, a relationship and ... sex.
You might have better luck if you try to meet men whose values more closely mirror your own. Do some volunteering, take a class or join a group activity you enjoy. As to your disappointment in the sexual performance of the men in your past who were emotionally available: Try to remember that men are teachable creatures and often eager to please, if you are willing to communicate what you need. Perhaps the problem is that those communication skills could use some polishing.