Hi, Helaine: I've got four middle-aged children, and I am well-off. My youngest daughter, age 45, is married to a man who is spiteful and possibly mentally ill. For more than a decade, he's done his best to alienate my daughter from me.

She and I are now on good terms after several difficult years, but I don't like the idea of her husband inheriting anything from me, so in my will I say if my daughter predeceases me, he is to get nothing. (They have no children.) A friend thinks this is a terrible idea, and will create bad feelings among my children because, of course, if my daughter is alive when I die, she will very likely see this clause excluding her husband. Is there a way I can keep everyone happy while also making sure my money goes to my children and not this interloper? -- Not a Penny for Son-in-Law

Dear Not a Penny: This is actually an easy one. If a beneficiary dies prior to the person who wrote the will, their share reverts to the estate and is divided among the other inheritors. Nothing need be said at all. If your other children have children, and you want them to inherit if their parent passes before you, you will need to put language in the will saying that. If you haven't done so already, I suggest doing that.

The only issue here is if you are worried about another child's spouse and want them to inherit in the sad event of a child predeceasing you. I see two solutions here. Either suggest they look into term life insurance to cover the amount they could expect to inherit. Or -- and this goes back to your original problem -- simply put language in your will that takes care of the daughter- or son-in-law you want to make sure is financially OK.

That won't necessarily make for peace in the family, but then again, what does your daughter expect? If she spent a decade with a man who attempted -- to use your word -- to alienate her from you, she shouldn't be surprised that you don't favor her husband. It's your money, and yours to parcel out as you wish

(To ask Helaine a question, email her at askhelaine@gmail.com.)

(EDITORS: For editorial questions, please contact Sue Roush at sroush@amuniversal.com)

Hi, Helaine: I own a home that’s divided into four apartments. I live in one and rent out the other three units. I like some tenants more than others but never experienced a difficult problem until now. In one unit, my tenant lost her job and says she can’t pay the rent until she gets on unemployment. In another, the tenants said their income fell by half, and asked if they could pay a fraction of their April rent now, and make good over the next several months when the COVID-19 closures end. The third tenant is good. Paid in full on April 1.

I understand this is unexpected, but I also need the money. The mortgage bill is due every month, whether they pay me or not. I save money for emergencies, why don’t my tenants? I want to tell them that if I don’t receive payment by a set date, I’m going to need to ask them to leave. Letting this slide is also unfair to the person who did make sure I received the rent on schedule. How would you handle this situation? -- Landlord Blues

Dear Landlord Blues: You are hardly alone, and the coronavirus pandemic is not just impacting small landlords like yourself. Large commercial landlords are also finding their tenants cannot pay the rent. Many jurisdictions have put a pause on evictions during this crisis, but even if you lived in one that didn’t, I’m not recommending it. Leaving aside the fact that it’s cruel and nasty, what new renter are you finding in the midst of all this? Your tenants didn’t suddenly morph into deadbeats. They are, just like you, victims of a sudden global health emergency and related financial crisis. I would speak with the two tenants who came to you and work something out. The unemployment system is experiencing extreme delays in many areas of the country, so it’s likely they will receive cash within the next few weeks. But it’s also possible you might need to cut their rent for a time. I realize that’s not ideal, but A) some income is better than none and B) as my grandmother would say, be a mensch. (That’s Yiddish for decent human being.)

If you are experiencing trouble paying your mortgage as a result of this crisis, you should reach out to your lender and ask for forbearance. If your loan is backed by the federal government -- and many are -- your lender will need to grant you the breathing space. It’s not ideal but it is better than default. Finally, since you raise the matter of emergency savings, all professional landlords should have money set aside for eventualities like this. I’d use it if you need it. If this isn’t an emergency, I don’t know what is.

(To ask Helaine a question, email her at askhelaine@gmail.com.)

(EDITORS: For editorial questions, please contact Sue Roush at sroush@amuniversal.com)

Hi, Helaine: My partner and I are both in our mid-40s. He earns about half what I do. Almost all our monthly income goes toward paying down our debt: There's the mortgage, two newer cars, a $40,000 401(k) loan, a $9,000 student loan and $16,000 in credit card debt. About half his monthly income goes to child support and will for one more year.

Now I've been offered an exciting position with my company, and it includes a transfer to Spain (when the current crisis is over, that is), and it will likely be for five years. The salary is in euros, but of course the debt is in U.S. dollars.

We'd really love to make this move for the European experience. I am considering taking on a five-year personal loan to pay off the student loan and the credit cards. We can break even keeping our home as a rental and sell the cars. My company's Spanish entity won't do 401(k) from my paycheck, so it will be reported to the IRS as an early withdrawal and incur taxes and penalties.

Given all this, I expect we will have very little money left over at the end of the month, until he can find a job and child support ends. Making the move seems like a poor financial decision, but an opportunity that may not come again. What would you do? -- Eager Ex-Pat

Dear Eager Ex-Pat: This is a tough one. I totally get the urge to travel and to take advantage of what might well be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. But I need to be honest: A move to Spain sounds like a financial catastrophe waiting to happen, and sooner rather than later.

You've no guarantee your partner will be able to find another job. You will run up a huge tax bill unless you take on a personal loan large enough to pay down the 401(k). And, to be even more honest, your financial house is not in order, and it sounds like that's been true for quite some time.

There's a joke about traveling when your life isn't going well: same troubles, different location. I'd make an addendum for you: worse troubles, different location. It sounds to me like you can't afford to take this opportunity.

I suggest you ask if you can revisit the offer in a year and use that time to both see how the world economy shakes out and attempt to get your own financial affairs in order. I'd recommend sitting down with a debt counselor from a nonprofit service who can review your bills and your income, and make suggestions on how to budget to pay off the debt.

And if this is a one-time offer from your employer, I'd suggest adding one more task to your agenda while paying down the debt: brainstorming other job options abroad -- for when you can afford to do it, that is.

(To ask Helaine a question, email her at askhelaine@gmail.com.)

(EDITORS: For editorial questions, please contact Sue Roush at sroush@amuniversal.com)