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Mudlines Archive

What a long, strange strip it's been

Welcome to the Doonesbury Mudline Archive!

  • February 9, 2019

    ..........CNN commentator Van Jones on SOTU: "I saw this as a psychotically incoherent speech with cookies and dog poop."....Ann Coulter on SOTU: "This was the lamest, sappiest, most intentionally tear-jerking SOTU ever. Please fire your speechwriter."....Joe Scarborough on SOTU: "If a seventh grader had written that in speech class they would have gotten an F."....Trump on House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff: "A political hack. He's just trying to make a name for himself...It's called presidential harrassment."....Donald Trump Jr. on WaPo Super Bowl ad supporting free press and First Amendment: "Leftist BS."....Trump on House Speaker Nancy Pelosi: "She's very bad for our country."....Stacey Abrams on government shutdown: "A stunt engineered by the President of the United States."....Bill O'Reilly on Abrams: "It is my job to tell you the truth so here it is -- too many Americans are more than happy to accept lies and turn the other way while bad things happen."....Trump on Dems: "Are becoming the party of late term abortions, high taxes, open borders, and crime!"....Tomi Lahren on immigrants from Mexico: "Do you want TB, HIV/AIDS, chicken pox or hepatitis in your communities, at your children's schools? Because I have a feeling the warm and fuzzy spirit of compassion doesn't treat or prevent diseases like those."....Donald Trump Jr. on Dems: "Illegal immigrants [are their] favorite constituents."....senior Trump adviser Stephen Miller: "I would be happy if not a single refugee foot ever again touched American soil."....Rep. Steve King: "White nationalist, white supremacist, Western civilization -- how did that language become offensive?"....Sen. Sherrod Brown: "We have a president who's a racist."....former Trump aide and WH communications staffer Cliff Sims: "Lincoln famously had his Team of Rivals. Trump had his Team of Vipers. We served. We fought. We brought our egos. We brought our personal agendas and vendettas. We were ruthless. And some of us, I assume, were good people."....Charles Krauthammer on Trump: "When the president's id speaks, the world listens."....Trump: "Schumer and the Democrats are big fans of being weak and passive with Iran."....Chris Christie on Trump administration: "Bad people and stupid people lie. People who are not good people, or people who are dumb, lie."....Rep. Maxine Waters on Trump: "A disgusting liar, documented to have lied over 8,000 times in two years."....Trump on NYT: "Treats me so unbelievably terribly."....conservative commentator Mike Cernovich on Trump: "A broken man."....David Gergen: "There are moments when the president seems increasingly unhinged...The most powerful man in the world hears things we don't hear and sees things we don't see. That's hardly reassuring."....Jonathan Alter on Trump: "The Grifter-in-Chief."....Ann Coulter on Trump: "Lazy and incompetent."....Newt Gingrich on Coulter: "She's off here in some fantasyland where she gets to be noisy, which helps her sell books."....former Starbucks employee and union organizer Anne Bellov on a Howard Schultz vs Donald Trump presidential race: "I'd probably vote for Howard. At least he's not insane, just self-interested and clueless."................................................

  • January 30, 2019

    ..........Sen. John Kennedy on Roger Stone: "A total Beavis...He talked himself into an indictment...When his IQ gets to 75, he ought to sell."....Trump on WH memoirist Cliff Sims: "A low level staffer that I hardly knew...He was nothing more than a gofer...He is a mess!"....Sims on Trump: "History's greatest troll."....Ann Coulter on Newt Gingrich: "Trump voters have fallen into two factions: the Tell the Truth faction and the Kiss the Emperor's Ass camp. Newt and I have picked different camps."....Trump on Sen. Richard Blumenthal: "'Da Nang Dick'...An embarrassment to our Country!"....Chris Christie on former National Security adviser Mike Flynn: "Russian lackey and future federal felon."....Trump on Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz: "Doesn't have the guts to be president."....WH Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders on Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez: "I don't think we're going to listen to her on much of anything."....Rush Limbaugh: "Stalin, Hitler, Mao Tse-Tung all came to power promising the same kinds of things that Ms. Ocasio-Cortez is promising. And it led to mass murder, it led to dictatorship, it led to genocide...Folks, this is what the Democrat Party has become."...Eric Trump on Dems: "They don't want law and order...They've become crazy...It's almost an anti-American message."....WaPo editorial board on Trump: "Stark incapacity for leadership...Has failed as a dealmaker."....Stephen King: "How long before Trump supporters realize that you don't surround yourself with dirty guys unless you're dirty yourself?"....Lou Dobbs on Trump shutdown: "Got rolled."....MSNBC's Ari Melber on Trump: "We're seeing a new low in presidential work ethic in contrast to recent presidents who kept far busier schedules."....Trump, showing visitors the WH dining room: "[Obama] just sat in here and watched basketball all day."....Bill Maher on Trump: "A lying conman."....CNN's Jake Tapper on WH attitude toward furloughed workers: "Let them eat Trump Steak!"....CNN anchor Chris Cuomo on Fox News: "The administration favors that place because it's the Mothership."....former CIA Director Leon Panetta: "Rudy Giuliani is basically operating like a human pinball machine...Telling too many stories that don't establish themselves in truth."....Lanny Davis on Giuliani: "Mentally unstable."....MSNBC's Joe Scaraborough on Trump foreign policy: "In every case it's retreat, retreat, retreat, surrender, surrender, retreat."....John Kerry on Trump administration: "There's no secret about how chaotic this is, and increasingly, there is no secret about how corrupt it is...Resign."....Ann Coulter on her support of Trump: "I'm a very stupid girl."............................................

  • January 21, 2019

    Rep. Jim McGovern on Trump: "Kept his promise to run our government like he ran his companies: shut down, with unpaid workers and blaming everyone but himself."....Trump on Dems: "Will soon be known as the Party of Crime."....former NJ Gov. Chris Christie on Trump: "Saddled with riffraff...[Has a] revolving door of deeply flawed individuals -- amateurs, grifters, weaklings, convicted and unconvicted felons -- who were hustled into jobs they were never suited for, sometimes seemingly without so much as a background check via Google or Wikipedia."....Ann Coulter: "We voted for Trump and got Jeb!"....Carl Bernstein on Russia story: "We have a president of the United States who lies...serially, routinely, compulsively such as never has happened in our modern history of the presidency."....Laura Trump on Michael Cohen: "A very desperate man. He holds no water whatsoever...A fraud, and he's trying to get his last couple minutes of fame."....Trump on Cohen: "Lying to reduce his jail time!"....George Will on Trump: "Whenever he must interact with experienced and accomplished people, he is as bewildered as a kindergartener at a seminar on string theory."....Trump on Pelosi: "So petrified of the 'lefties' in her party that she has lost control...And by the way, clean up the streets in San Francisco, they are disgusting."....Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez on Fox: "Has crossed a line beyond conservatism and into outright bigotry with their financing of Tucker Carlson and Laura Ingraham."....Ingraham on Ocasio-Cortez: "How about the privilege of being a protected member of a class that you can never criticize, lest you be called racist?"....Arwa Mahdawi on Ingraham: "Once you ignore all the facts, it's very clear that minorities are having a grand old time in America."....Trump on former FBI Director James Comey: "Either he's a bad liar or he's grossly incompetent."....Lloyd Green on White House: "An island of misfit toys."....Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro: "Just like Hitler persecuted the Jewish people, Donald Trump persecutes the people of Venezuela."....Trump on Dems: "A party of open borders and crime."....bumper sticker: "Pray for Trump Psalm 109:8."....Rep. Dan Kildee on shutdown: "This is the president essentially being a man-baby."....Nia-Malika Henderson on Beto's road trip: "Jack Kerouac-style, he roams around, jobless (does he not need a job?) to find himself and figure out if he wants to lead the free world. This is a luxury no woman or even minority in politics could ever have."....Trump on the U.S.: "Death is pouring through, not just at the border."....Bret Stephens on the West: "Rudderless...With limited resources but ruthless methods, Vladimir Putin has gone about undermining democracy from Kiev to Kansas."....Trump: "So funny to watch Schumer groveling."....Tucker Carlson guest Mark Steyn: "The white supremacists are American citizens. The illegal immigrants are people who shouldn't be here."....Trump: "The Left has become totally unhinged. They no longer care what is Right for our Country!"....former Coast Guard Commandant Adm. Thad Allen on shutdown: "It's not responsible leadership...Sooner or later we're going to have to do something about the constitutional amnesia that has swept Washington."....Trump: "Liberals care more about illegal immigrants than they do about our own citizens."....Bob Woodward on Mueller investigation: "I am thankful I don't have to cover this story on a daily basis."....Carli B. on shutdown: "Our country is in a hellhole right now. All for a f***ing wall. Bitch, I'm scared...This s*** is crazy."..................................................

  • January 14, 2019

    Trump on NBC and MSNBC: "They report stories, purposely, the exact opposite of the facts."....Trump on former FBI Director James Comey: "He was a bad cop and he was a dirty cop and he lied."....foreign policy analyst Strobe Talbott: "Trump has been colluding with a hostile Russia throughout his presidency. We'll see if it started before that."....Trump to reporter: "Not only did I never work for Russia, I think it's a disgrace that you even asked that question. Because it's a whole big fat hoax. It's just a hoax."....conservative commentator Charlie Sykes: "How many times do you have to have Lucy take the football away before you realize that you're not going to be able to make a deal with somebody like Donald Trump, who is an unreliable negotiator?"....Trump on NBC: "May be the most dishonest reporters of all time."....CNN's Jim Acosta on Trump Oval Office remarks: "Probably should have come with a Surgeon General's warning. It was hazardous to the truth."....Kellyanne Conway on Acosta: "Such a smartass most of the time."....GOP strategist Rick Wilson on Oval Office remarks: "Contained more lies per second than any presidential speech in history...The man who gleefully put kids in cages tried to briefly pretend that he gives a damn about migrant children in the least convincing humanitarian performance since the Child Catcher in 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.'"....Seth McFarlane on Oval Office remarks: "Had the cadence of a 'Wheel of Fortune' contestant solving the puzzle."....Trump on Dems: "They don't give a damn about crime. They don't care about crime."....Sean Hannity: "In order to obstruct the president's agenda, the hate-Trump Democrats, hate-Trump media actually have to pretend that border security doesn't matter."....Newt Gingrich on Pelosi and Schumer: "Their idea of a compromise is to get everything they want and leave our border open and country unsafe."....Trump: "I find China, frankly, in many ways to be far more honorable than Cryin' Chuck and Nancy. I really do."....Tamar Jacoby, president of Immigration Works, on immigration policy: "The debate going on is one of cartoon characters jousting when what we need are brain surgeons."....Trump to acting chief of staff Mick Mulvaney during meeting with Dems about shutdown: "Stop, stop, just stop. What are you doing? You're f***ing it all up, Mick."....Constitutional law professor Lawrence Lessig on Trump: "He says we have a national crisis...a national emergency. I agree...but the emergency is this president. The emergency is the fact that we don't have an executive who's exercising his power in a responsible way."....Sen. Tim Kaine: "Why punish people who are applying for food stamps because the president is having a temper tantrum?"....Rush Limbaugh on Mueller investigation: "After all this time, they can't afford to issue a report that basically says 'We didn't find anything.' No independent counsel ever has, and certainly not this collection of snakes..."....government ethics lawyer Walter Shaub on Trump administration: "Like an Escher drawing on an Etch-a-Sketch."....former CA Gov. Jerry Brown on climate change: "The threat is huge; the response is puny; and the consciousness, the awareness, is pathetically small...I find the metaphor most congenial to describing this problem is sleepwalking."....Christian Bale, accepting Golden Globe for his "Vice" portray of Dick Cheney: "Thank you to Satan, for giving me inspiration on how to play this role."....former Dubya speechwriter and Rumsfeld associate Matt Latimer on "Vice": "I can say without fear of contradiction that with the arguable exception of 'Hello, Dick,' there is not a sentence in the film attributed to him that the real Don Rumsfeld would have ever uttered."....Seth Meyers on Trump: "Incompetent and unhinged. He's virtually incapable of uttering a truthful or coherent thought about almost anything."....Sarah Silverman on Trump: "Your Twitter feed is a massive confession."............................................

  • January 6, 2019

    Sen. Mazie Hirono on Trump: "In meltdown mode...The only wall that's real is the one that's closing in on him."....Trump: "Everyone, other than drug dealers, human traffickers and criminals, want [the wall] very badly!"....WSJ on Trump account of Soviet-Afghan war: "We cannot recall a more absurd misstatement of history by an American President."....David Frum: "President Trump just endorsed the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan in 1979. Who's he working for?"....Clive Irving on Trump: "An empty vessel into which ideas can easily be seeded."....Trump on Syria: "We're talking about sand and death...We're not talking about vast wealth. We're talking about sand and death...I don't want to be in Syria forever."....Sen. Chris Coons on Syria withdrawal: "President Trump is handing a great big Christmas gift to Vladimir Putin of Russia and to the Ayatollah Khamenei of Iran."....MSNBC contributor Charles sykes: "It is an extraordinary moment when the president of the United States listens to Rush Limbaugh and not General Mattis."....Ann Garen on Trump at cabinet meeting: "Ninety-five minutes of outright falsehoods...revisionist history and self-aggrandizement."....Timothy Egan on Trump: "Can rarely go a single hour without telling a lie."....retired four-star Gen. Stanley McChrystal on Trump: "I don't think he tells the truth. I think he is [immoral]."....Trump on McChrystal: "Got fired like a dog by Obama...Known for big, dumb mouth. Hillary lover!"....former Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid on Trump: "One of the worst presidents we've ever had...We've had some bad ones, and there's not even a close second...He is not immoral but is amoral...No conscience."....Laurence Leamer on Trump: "His heady blend of ignorance, certitude, and arrogance fooled many of the people most of the time."....Mitt Romney on Trump: "Has not risen to the mantle of office...[His] words and actions have caused dismay around the world."....Trump on Romney: "Is he a Flake? I hope not...I won big, he didn't."....US ambassador to the UN Nikki Haley on UNESCO: "Among the most corrupt and politically biased UN agencies. Today the US withdrawl from this cesspool became official."....Star Parker, Center for Urban Renewal and Education president, on food stamp recipients: "These guys are not working. They're watching. They're watching porn, they're watching TV, they're watching women, they're watching everything, but they're not working."....Matt Lewis on Sen. Elizabeth Warren: "A combination of some of the horrible math teachers I endured in middle school, and a friend's overly emotional mom."....GOP strategist-consultant Ed Rollins on Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez: "The little girl who wants pre-Reagan economics of 70 percent taxes."....Ocasio-Cortez on Rollins: "A walking argument to tax misogyny at 100%."....Paul Krugman: "[Ocasio-Cortez] definitely knows more economics than almost everyone in the GOP caucus."....Rep. Jerry Nadler on separation policy: "This is inhuman, and it's not precedented. It's a deliberate creation of the Trump administration, which is trying to make things as miserable as possible. And if kids die, they're apparently willing to have that."....Ann Coulter on Trump: "Gutless president in a wall-less country...In the end, we'll probably find out 'wall' was Trump's safe word with Stormy Daniels. It's just something he blurts out whenever he's in trouble."....Sen. Jeff Merkley on wall: "A fourth-century strategy."....House Homeland Security Committee chairman Rep. Bennie Thompson on Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielson's border security presentation: "Misinformation and outright lies."....Michael Tomasky: "Anybody with half a critical mind and an attention span longer than a gerbil's could figure out in 2016 that Donald Trump was no master negotiator."....Bill Saporito: "Trump is King Minus. Everything he touches turns to lead. And everyone else is at fault but him."....Trump: "The Fed is like a powerful golfer who can't score because he has no touch -- he can't putt."....Chris Hayes on Trump: "It's like we elected the guy at the end of the bar to be president, and now we're all stuck in the bar with him."....Sarah Huckabee Sanders on former FBI Director James Comey: "The President did the country a service by firing him and exposing him for the shameless fraud that he is."....Proud Boys founder Gavin McInnes, on "Hate Has No Home Here" signs in his Larchmont, NY neighborhood: "If you have that sign on your lawn, you're a f***ing retard."....newly-sworn-in Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib: "We're going to go in there, we're going to impeach the mother****er."....Stephen Colbert on Nixon: "Oh history, please repeat yourself. We did our part by not learning from you."............................................